Jewish Boy Problems

Looking for writers

Happy belated Hanukkah! Hope you all got the BMWs and iPads you hoped for.

I’m seeking writers for Found at Bubbe’s. If you have ever found something cool or odd at your grandparents’ home, I’m sure you wanted to tell someone about it. Why not tell your story to captive audience of your Jewish peers? Entries are very short (200-300 words) and typically include a photo.

Considering many of you are in Boca/Del Ray/WPB, etc., this shouldn’t be too much of an issue. Even if you don’t think you’re an amazing writer, there are many who would love to read about some interesting artifacts.

Email me at foundatbubbes@gmail.com for more information.

Thanks!

JBP

Be a business leader

You could say I’m pretty entrepreneurial. I like making business connections, working toward a goal, and seeing it through to completion. Does this sound like you? Do you also have dreams of living in NYC and learning from top Jewish execs? This might be for you.

Additional information? email dianaesaiov@gmail.com

#20FactsAboutMySister

1. She was the first born and has known Consuela the longest (I’m jealous)
2. In her words, “Hayyyy, I graduated from ‘Cuse in ‘10 and now I do fashion PR in the greatest city in the world.”
3. She was recently cut off after spending her grocery money on Marc Jacobs sunglasses
4. Bubbe sends my sister checks every month (don’t tell my Dad!)
5. She owned so many types of Ugg footwear in high school to the point where she took over her own closet and the linen closet in the hallway
6. Her ideal guy works in finance and “is like, from Syosset or Roslyn and knows my camp BFFs”
7. My sister is 24 and acts like a college freshman (likes to blackout at random bars on Murray Hill)
8. She wanted to live in Windsor Court until my father found out monthly rent costs more than our mortgage and his monthly BMW payment combined
9. At one point she wanted to marry her teen tour boyfriend from Highland Park. My Mom almost plotzed.
10. She chose her first job based on its proximity to Goldman Sachs
11. When I was sick at college in ‘09, she sent me matzoh ball soup through Hillel
12. She was genuinely angry when my parents wouldn’t let her go on March of the Living
13. When I was sad for a period of time, she tried to set me up with her friends’ younger sisters
14. One time when we were little, Consuela dented a 90-year-old Kiddush cup, and my sister took the blame…thinking Consuela (our second mom) would be fired
15. She gave me her phone upgrade when my phone floated away in the Hamptons
16. She’s trying really hard to change her raspy JAP voice
17. Her obsession with Kabbalah was troubling until she seemed to find some sort of inner peace (only during weeknights)
18. When I turned 18, she took me out for a nice dinner with her babysitting money
19. I cooked her dinner one time in her apartment and she paid me with a bottle of Skyy
20. She’s my favorite JAP

#LiesIToldMyParents

#ListOfTurnOns

Girls who…

• are decisive
• have actual work experience and know the value of a dollar
• are go-getters
• like to read and/or write
• enjoy premium cable shows
• like to eat good food
• like to cook meals with friends
• genuinely care about what you have to say
• do not describe themselves as a “betch”
• don’t try to eat a falafel lafa without making a mess (it’s impossible)
• have long brown hair and tan skin
• have a good relationship with their parents and family members
• are smiling more often than not
• value intelligence but also know when to lay-back and be funny
• hate pranks as much as I do
• wouldn’t mind staying in, getting wine drunk, and devouring a tub of hummus
• are “tight” with bouncers
• prefer bars or lounges over clubs
• find nothing amusing about amusement parks
• aren’t overly religious, but love to honor family traditions and customs
• enjoy talking to adults (i.e.: friends’ parents) as much as I do
• mix wasabi in the soy sauce at sushi restaurants
• prefer Instagram over every other social network
• have aspirations to truly be the best they can be and impact others in a positive manner

Where are you, NJGs?